It has been many years since Beatrice Silver of the Sumas First Nation was forced to undergo the horrors of the residential school system, but she still carries the trauma of what happened to her and her friends there with her, using it to help shape how she views things like Truth and Reconciliation Day.
A survivor of St. Mary's Residential School in Mission, Silver has since documented much of what happened to the Indigenous students there, releasing a book called "Lexeywa – I Pass the Torch to You" in 2018.
"My book starts from the day I first went to residential school, and it tells you the horrors there," Silver said. "It doesn't tell you everything, but I do touch on waking up with girls missing in the night, and we know that a couple of them were murdered."
As an adult, she has dedicated much of her time to trying to repair relationships between Indigenous people and white people, which were strained by centuries of atrocities.
"Residential school people have been beaten, starved and mistreated," Silver said. "A lot of our friends are now dead. It was worse than prison."
As Truth and Reconciliation Day approaches, it is a bit of a sore topic for those like Silver, who believe that most Caucasian people don't know what the concept truly means and think that it's all about throwing on an orange shirt and being polite to local Indigenous people.
"Truth and reconciliation is not used properly by most people," she said.
The ideal version of this concept would involve a more thorough partnership between Indigenous and non-Indigenous groups, especially when it comes to business and land developments.
"When a company comes and does business near any reserve in Canada, they have to reach out to any Native company that is skilled and able to do the job, and they have to hire Native people," Silver explained.
"What's happening is that big companies are coming to the band office and talking to whoever, then saying they connected with Natives and it's all a go."
She said that she has seen examples in the province's other Indigenous bands where companies and the local Indigenous members have actually worked together to form an in-depth relationship that benefits both parties equally.
"I think when we talk truth and reconciliation, it can't just be about 'work with the Natives'; it has to be where they truly embrace the Native culture and want their grandchildren to succeed from what they're doing today," Silver said.
"We want our children to be able to come down here on our property and have our own stuff; our own store, our own cafe, our own gym – everything. Other bands are getting it, but we aren't."
During her time as the former Chief of the Sumas First Nation and current member of the Sts'elemeqw Residential School Thrivers Society, Silver has seen several examples throughout the province where the ideal version of truth and reconciliation is being practised.
She specifically named Osoyoos Indian Band Chief Clarence Louie, Matsqui First Nation Chief Alice McKay, and Tseshaht First Nation Chief Ken Watts as Indigenous leaders who should be looked to as examples of what Sumas First Nation and other B.C. bands should be pursuing.
"If you want the Natives to be partners with you and be OK in your society, then truth and reconciliation is to include us in everything you're doing that is near us," Silver said.
"Truth and reconciliation is about doing due diligence with the Native people and respecting that they have a say in what you're doing."
In terms of the actual Truth and Reconciliation Day, she said it's a very busy time for Indigenous elders like herself, with many of them often participating in multiple ceremonies to try to share this message.
But while many parks and public places are flooded with a sea of orange shirts, she said many Indigenous people choose to mark the day with their own private ceremonies, which had previously been closed to outsiders. However, this has now changed this year for the first time ever.
"For a while, it was closed, and we wouldn't let anybody in because we needed to talk, we needed to cry, and we needed to be together," Silver said.
"This is the first year that we're saying white people can come and see."
In addition to the Sumas First Nation ceremony, which takes place on Sept. 29, the third annual Stetis Imexstowx Gathering is scheduled for Sept. 30 and will take place at Thunderbird Memorial Square from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m.
More details can be found at stetisimexstowx.ca.
